Let’s Talk About My Nigerian Wedding – Part 2

Siri, play “She’s about to be a wife,
She’s about to be a wife,
He's about to wife her up,
Wife her up,
Wife her up,”

Cheeeeeeee. Yes, I’m excited.

My wedding is happening soon, and as the days go by, I feel more and more grounded in the decisions we’ve made so far. Planning a wedding has a funny way of reminding you that the only real rule is this:

Your wedding should reflect you and your partner. Not traditions. Not trends. Not what people expect you to do.

You don’t have to do anything at your wedding that doesn’t feel right to you. And because weddings are once-in-a-lifetime events, the last thing you want is to look back and wish you had stayed true to yourselves.

So today, I’m sharing a few things that will absolutely not be happening at my wedding.

1. No long ceremony. No African time: When it comes to the ceremony, we are keeping it short and sweet. We are both not fans of lateness or long, drawn-out events. The ceremony is about the commitment we’re making to each other, not about stretching time. We want to get the ball rolling and quickly get to the part where it’s just the two of us beginning our life together.

2. No first look with my husband (for white wedding): I know many couples love doing a first look before the ceremony. It helps calm nerves and gives you time for photos before everything starts.

It’s cute. I get it. But we’re keeping this one traditional. The first time my husband will see me is walking down the aisle. My first bridal look, however, will be with my dad and my girls, and I already know that moment will be special.

3. No army of content creators: There was a big Lagos wedding this week, and every time I saw clips from it, I couldn’t stop thinking about how performative weddings have become. Why does every guest now come with their own content team? Why does every vendor bring a content creator? Why are there 50 people with phones and cameras surrounding the couple?

Honestly, that would send me straight into overstimulation. I love the internet. Truly. But I don’t want my wedding day to feel like a content production set.

So we’ll keep it simple: No crowd of content creators. No vendor content teams hovering around us either.

4. No mascots at the afterparty: Whoever started the trend of bringing gorillas and random mascots to wedding after-parties should be jailed. Because why???

There are so many wedding details that feel unnecessary in the grand scheme of things. Most guests won’t remember the mascots or circus-style performances anyway. What they will remember is the music, the food, the vibe, and the fact that everyone had a good time.

5. No traditional bridal fan with my name on it. No… we’re not doing that.

6. No rainbow-colored reception dress: What happened to a classic white reception dress?

I’m bringing it back. My wedding style vision is simple, chic, and timeless. I want pieces that still feel elegant years from now and that I can actually repurpose later. Because bridal fashion is expensive, and these outfits are not living one day and dying.

7. No dance competitions or scavenger hunts, etc.: Not judging anyone who loves these, it’s just not our thing. We don’t want to put our friends on the spot to entertain the guests. Just eat, drink, dance, and enjoy yourselves. That’s the assignment.

8. I will not be holding back my emotions:

My makeup artist might have one of the hardest jobs that day because I fully intend to be an emotional bride. When you see me tearing up, please don’t say “don’t cry.” Let me cry!!!

It’s been a long journey getting here, and I plan to feel every moment of it.

9. We won’t be having aso ebi for the white wedding ceremony. One of our priorities was making the day easy and affordable for our guests, so there’s no need to buy aso ebi. Just come dressed in your Sunday best and celebrate with us.

I’d love to hear from you: what’s one thing you decided not to do at your wedding?

Things I love this week

1. A Man Called Ove by Fredrik Backman. I was recently inducted into the church of Fredrik Backman’s writing, and now I’m convinced I need to read every single book he’s ever written.
2. Dunsin Oyekan’s new song, Baruch Hashem Adonai, has been on repeat for me. Honestly, who needs the club when you can have such a powerful time in God’s presence at the Upper Room? If you’ve never attended, you should definitely come next month.

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 As always, thank you for being here and for being you. ❤